| 14 July 2009
Here's what Big Head had to say about it at the time: "Billed as a 'beautiful gift to display year round,' this nutcracker could be interpreted a bit racist, and resembles Bert from Sesame Street. Ironically, the seller is located in Kansas. Plus, it's creepy as hell."
You're probably wondering why I'm bringing this horrible image back into your head after you've spent the last two months in therapy trying to get rid of the night terrors caused by this miniature nutcracking DeMarre Carroll. There is actually a point to all of this other than me trying to make your life a living hell.
For those of you that don't know me personally I recently graduated from Ol' Mizzou. So of course I've been getting a plethora of cards and cash from close friends and family and the occasional cousin who I haven't spoken to in over a decade. It's all greatly appreciated. But I received one suspiciously large rectangular package from the family of a good buddy from high school. You probably realize where this is going.
There he is. Hanging out at my graduation party last week. And in a few weeks he will be sitting comfortably in my new apartment. Sitting. Staring. Watching. Always watching.
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